Debbi Gray is a born and bred Lakes Entrance girl who has just had her book – A Simple Twist of Fate – published after 30 years in the making.
She has no arms and her legs are half the length expected and now at the age of 67 she is finally telling her story.
The book came about after she started public speaking at schools many years ago and that gave her the incentive to start writing her story.
She wanted to find a way to say “we (people with disability) are just like everyone else”, but to many she is an incredibly strong and tenacious woman who has reached more goals than a lot of abled bodied persons.
“I was blessed with an incredible family and grew up with no embarrassment, they were upfront about who I was and what I was,” Debbi said.
“They helped instil in me a right to be here and that I was as entitled as anybody else to live life.”
In the book Debbi reminisces that she had a wonderful childhood with an encouraging and loving family and a local community that accepted and included her.
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“My mum Cam and dad Bimbo determined I would have as normal life as possible and growing up I always had the support of my older brother Geof and my younger brother Jim,” she said.
“A friend tells the story when we were at mum’s in-laws and she reported to mum,
‘Cammie, Deb’s climbing the lemon tree’. Mum’s reply was she will only fall out of it once, and that was keeping things normal.
“I was never one for dresses and dolls and was always out in the dirt helping dad. My beloved Jim would be in the kitchen with mum and became an a la carte cook.”
An indication of her independence was that Debbi left home at 16 to live in Melbourne and started some rehabilitation to guide her into work.
“Jim and I shared a house a couple of times, and we would go on the tear,” she said.
“I also remember dad converted a golf buggy so I could scoot off to work along the Esplanade, from Elwood to Port Melbourne. I think it was the first prototype for today’s mobility scooters.”
Debbi obtained a job as an “A” grade telephonist for the Navy at HMAS Lonsdale, which she did for many years, even being presented with a Naval plaque of recognition when she left. She then worked in a rehabilitation centre for disabled and drug addicted.
“I met such a variety of people, it made me accept everybody and see how different human beings can be, how resilient and how easy they can break.”
Debbi then got the travel bug and bought a one-way ticket and headed overseas.
“I know many who stayed home but I had an innate drive to get out and about and travelled the world,” she said.
At the age of 36 she had her beloved daughter Emma and had six weeks of help with cleaning and meal preparation. Mum and bub moved into Debbi’s existing home when Emma was two and a half.
Debbi said so many asked how do you do this or that?
“But I just worked things out. I remember Col Kleehammer made me a rotating change table which was a real blessing as I could just spin Emma around to change a nappy or dress her.”
Debbi is proud of Emma’s achievements as she had to study for many years and is now a qualified vet.
Deb’s other passion for several years was the Variety Bash.
“I really enjoyed the comradeship, rough nut driving, although I was well respected as a driver, I was in my element and had many great experiences over the years,” she said.
Deb was always an independent driver in her modified car but had to stop in 2019 because of hip issues. She now relies on taxis and can’t speak highly enough of how the Lakes Entrance Taxi Service supports her.
“They grab my groceries from the supermarket and bring them in and unpack them,” she said.
“During the bushfires when I had enough of being evacuated, I decided to stay in my home, but the taxi owner said if it gets too hairy I will come and get you.”
Debbi, who is now virtually wheelchair bound is having issues with NDIS funding for her travel. She says it has been cut off which will stop her going to
Bairnsdale twice a week for valuable work and volunteering that she does as membership officer at Bairnsdale and District Art Society and at Noweyung every Wednesday assisting with the Colour Gang and other activities.
“The NDIS just cut me off, it is not what suits each candidate these days, but I have to stand up for myself and others,” she said.
“They really tire me and remind me I have no arms and legs. I feel it is there to service the bureaucrats. Without my transport to Bairnsdale, I will just have to sit at home with no socialisation.
A Simple Twist of Fate is available now at Lakes Books and Games where there will be a book signing on Friday, December 19, and a book launch on January 9 at the Mechanics Hall meeting room at 2pm.
Debbi has worked hard on this book and has been supported along the way by Andrew Rule, as well as Garry Baker as a hired editor.
“I can now do my crocheting, drawing or be outdoors without feeling guilty that I should be working on the book,” Debbi said.
